Job req o' the day

Saw this in an email from a recruiter

JASON is a .net web service now?  Retirement must be tough.

And LINK?  Um, can't think up a snarky comment for that one.  

Back in the dot com days I got probably 5 calls a day from recruiters wanting someone that knew "ESS-QUE-ELL" Server.  "Nope, sorry, don't know it, bye."  I won't talk with a recruiter that doesn't know the absolute basics of our industry, like how to pronounce the technology.  If the recruiter doesn't know the basics of the technology then how can she fulfill her client's requisition?  These recruiters are relying on the client to have a perfect req prepared and the recruiter functions solely as the middle man, trying to mine for gold.  But you'll never find gold if you don't know what gold looks like.  These recruiters cold call possible candidates by scouring job boards and LinkedIn.  Sorry, but I've wasted far too many hours taking phone interviews for ESS-QUE-ELL Server jr dba positions that I would've had no interest in if the recruiter would've understood the client's ask.  

(I don't know this Jason either)

Now, I've heard people use the auto mechanic analogy to dispute my contention that recruiters should understand what they are recruiting.  "You don't need to know anything about an internal combustion engine to go to a mechanic when your car won't run."  

Wrong analogy.  That analogy would apply if a business person asked me how to write a query.  I expect a business person not to know technical matters.  That's why they hired me.  And I hire a mechanic because I don't know engines.  

A better analogy for a recruiter is a used car dealer.  "I won't buy a used car from a dealer that can't tell me if the car has a V-8 or a V-6."  Exactly.  The used car dealer functions in an "agency" capacity (he finds you a car that meets your requirements) , just like the recruiter finds a candidate that meets the client's requirements.  

Yes, that's right, I just compared technical recruiters to used car salesmen.  But it's true.  I am buying a product from a recruiter, I expect him to have a cursory knowledge of that which he is selling.  

Not all technical recruiters are bad, just the ones that breath.

(kidding of course)

(Jason Sudeikis?...wait...no, I don't know this Jason either.)

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